first step

first step is a 14-week job-training program that empowers homeless, formerly homeless and low income women through a holistic and empathetic approach by providing computer training, social service support, internships, hope, literacy building, mentoring and job-placement assistance to improve self confidence and achieve employment and educational goals.

i have been involved with first step over the last two years by organizing makeover events at bumble and bumble, participating as a job coach and organizing my colleagues to teach classes at their facility. last evening, i had the honor of being the keynote speaker at their graduation. the women were upbeat, positive and optimistic for their future – truly inspiring. below is a copy of my speech.

Good evening. I am very honored to be here. I became acquainted with First Step through Estee Lauder two years ago. And my first experience with the program was in this very room, as a graduation attendee. I can’t think of a better way to be introduced to First Step. That evening, I was inspired, impressed and deeply moved by the graduates’ personal journeys. Therefore, I’m both humbled and thrilled to speak to you on this momentous occasion.

And here YOU are.

I thought a lot about what to say tonight – what would be meaningful and inspiring to you at this important moment. One thought kept coming to mind: the idea of putting yourself out there. This is something that all of you have done in such an enormous way, and that is why it feels so appropriate to speak about.

Putting yourself out there applies to many life situations. If you want to meet someone, it means going out with friends on a Friday night instead of sitting at home watching TV, or perhaps joining an online dating site. If you have a desire to create art, but don’t think you are creative, it means picking up a pen and sketching. Or if you want a job, it means enrolling in a 14-week program to gain skills and confidence to get into the workplace.

For many of you, enrolling in First Step was challenging, scary or uncomfortable. Perhaps you were intimidated by learning new skills or being in a group dynamic with other women. Or maybe you simply feared failure. Nevertheless, you knew the outcome of this experience would outweigh your fears. You weren’t willing to let fear be an obstacle to what you want in life. Hence, you put yourself out there.

During your program, you had a make-up lesson at Estee Lauder. I had the opportunity to attend a session a few years ago. I love that this is part of the First Step curriculum. No doubt computer skills are essential to finding a job, but how you feel about yourself and the way you portray yourself speaks volumes. Putting on make-up, wearing a nice outfit – again, all part of the way you present yourself to the world.

I have great respect for your achievements – not only for the things you learned and accomplished, but for taking the initiative to make a change in your life. I admire your courage to explore the unknown, ask questions and to present yourself to teachers, colleagues and bosses. When we do this, we allow ourselves to be judged, critiqued and potentially ridiculed. It often feels easier and safer to be on the sidelines. I know this feeling all too well.

I used to have a crippling fear of speaking in public. Even introducing myself to a group of people would leave my heart racing and my palms sweaty. I came head to head with this fear at summer camp in Indiana when I was 18 years old.

Every summer, we had a color war, where four teams competed in various challenges and competitions, such as tug-of-war and obstacle courses. That year, I was chosen to be co-captain of the green team. As captain, it was my job to maintain my team’s enthusiasm and spirit through cheers, pep talks and generally acting like a fool. Keep in mind that I could barely speak in front of groups, let alone be a cheerleader. What was supposed to be an honor – one of my friend’s was quite upset that she wasn’t selected captain – was my private nightmare. I was completely panicked, but felt that I had no choice but to go through with it. I dressed in head to toe green, put on my green war paint and went to battle – with myself. The green team lost that day, but of course the real victory was that I faced my fears and came out the other end stronger and more equipped to deal with future challenges.

Although it’s natural to avoid discomfort, I’ve learned that uncomfortable or foreign situations allow for growth and self-expression. A few years ago, still grappling with my fear of public speaking, I began to do just that – teaching and speaking to groups of people. But unlike being chosen color war captain, I elected to do it. I purposely did something that I found terrifying because I thought it would be a growth opportunity. Without a doubt it was – and still is, challenging. But with practice, it has become easier and more natural. For me, public speaking is putting myself out there in the greatest sense, which also makes it one of my biggest accomplishments.

I came across a quote (by author Heath L. Buckmaster) that really resonated with me:

“Often, it’s not about becoming a new person, but becoming the person you were meant to be, and already are, but don’t know how to be.”

I find this message both comforting and optimistic because it implies that we already have everything we need to become who we want to be. It’s like a tiny seed that contains all the materials needed to grow into a tree. We don’t have to be someone we’re not, or change into a completely different person. We can take what is already inside and make it better.

It is clear that what’s inside YOU is motivation and a desire for growth. Graduation marks the start of a new chapter in your life. You are leaving the familiarity of the First Step classroom and your internship and putting yourself out there. I encourage you to continue your education, ask questions and don’t be afraid to fail. And ultimately, do not let life pass you by. We all have it inside ourselves to be who we want to be – and you ladies are well on your way.